Photo credit: shotbyev
Ebony Marketing Systems President and Founder Kai K. Fuentes shares why embarrassment is her superpower.
“I carried a watermelon” is a line from one of my favorite movies, “Dirty Dancing,” because it embraces that awkward embarrassment we’ve all experienced. I’m embracing embarrassment, not wrestling with awkwardness anymore. Embracing embarrassment begins with a Momma story.
I have a son who is dyslectic and was having trouble reading. When we peeled back the onion, we found embarrassment hiding behind his fear. He wants to avoid embarrassment at all costs. He has literally gone into flight, running out of the classroom when he’s embarrassed.
As a momma, I felt forced to embrace embarrassment. To show my son, I had to lead by example. Here’s how that went down. I went to Seton Hall to see a friend get an award. Big night at a big university. My son came along because he likes to go with me to Seton Hall.
“Momma, I need to go the bathroom.”
In the bathroom mirror, I see that my dress is tucked into my pantyhose. Been that way since we rushed out the house. I know people saw me. My panties were out. My son’s face, he was about to fall out.
“Momma, what are you going to do?”
“Son, I’m going to pull my dress out and I’m going back out there.”
When I decided that my son’s trigger would be my superpower, to set a good example, I’ve discovered that I’m not afraid to:
1) put myself out there (pun intended, folks!);
2) try new things;
3) practice the ultimate vulnerability because I believe when we’re vulnerable we’re out best selves.
In business, fear of embarrassment puts good ideas in the corner. Now, I’m un-shelving those ideas! In 2025, we hosted our first large live client event. Was there embarrassment potential? Oh yeah. What if no one shows? What if it’s too politely quiet? What if people leave the swag or I find it in the trash? What if the food is no bueno? Still did it. And guess what? It was a great evening. I think because I was afraid of embarrassment, I’ve never done anything like that before, so wild, right?
Recently we did our team training specifically on communication. Our team has very good communication but you know communication can always be better. Embarrassment whispered to me, what if the team says something about me as a leader? I reminded myself that yes, I could be embarrassed but then again I wouldn’t be. Because my team would be standing in their calm vulnerability saying something. My role is to hear that and know at the end of the day I’m going to be okay. At the end of the day I’m going to be okay — those words make embarrassment a super power.
Embarrassment is going to happen in business. We were sued once. There’s a high level of embarrassment to have your account frozen. To have a long-time client called about the lawsuit in an attempt to implicate them. To figure out a way to make payroll. In the end, we lost some business. But the long-time client remains a now longer-time client. We have team members who went through this and are still with us. I wondered how am I going to go out into the world when I have this skeleton in my closet? Yet that time sharpened my business acumen to levels I thought I never had. I leaned into it and turned it around for good. At the end of day, I was okay.
And my son? First day of a much-anticipated soccer camp, he was chosen last. I was expecting to hear that he ran off into the woods. Or that he didn’t want to go back. He was embarrassed but he went back the next day and scored two goals. Two goals he would not have scored if embarrassment had stopped him.
My son’s journey has taught me to look behind the fear and see if embarrassment is there. Nine times of out ten, I think that’s what behind fear. Embarrassment, is that all? I’ll embrace that. I’ll use embarrassment as my superpower to be a better business person, a better parent, a better spouse and member of all communities I am part of. I’ll recognize that when I’m living up to my best potential.
